strange_aeons: (follow the leader)
[personal profile] strange_aeons
Admit it: you were wondering.

(I have removed the digressions for the sake of clarity and length, though I left in the one with [livejournal.com profile] lstone because it contributes to the atmosphere; I also moved a couple of lines around for the same reason.)

[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "FINALLY someone is here to FIX THE FUCKING WASHING MACHINE."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen looks for the obvious agitation joke but fails to find it with good timing.
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut laughs anyway.
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "There's the other obvious joke, about how if it's fucking, it probably is a good idea to get it fixed before you've got a litter of baby washing machines on your hands."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "Then I'd never have to share. ... breed faster, home appliance!"
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "Depends on whether it's fucking in a procreative fashion, too."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "Well, the only other appliance convenient to it is the dryer. Does it belong to a different species, or are they members of the same extremely sexually dimorphic species?"
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "That's a good question, really. I can see arguments made either way."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "If it's the latter, that raises questions about toilets and bidets."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "And then there are those washer-dryer-single-unit-closet-things, which suggest either a speciation point, a mule-type hybrid, or, uh, a third thing that fell out of my head when I got this far into the sentence."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "Hermaphrodite."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "Or a hermaphrodite, or something like the supermales you get in some species of fish."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "Thank you."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "[livejournal.com profile] tiger_spot says that she thinks they're probably cooperative species, like humans and wolves, or whatnot. The fact that they are often seen in washer-dryer pairs but don't appear to breed argues against sexually-dimorphic members of the same species."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "I am wondering if maybe they're symbiotes of a sort where occasionally one gets a parasitic form where the dryer gets fused into the washer."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "So is a washer-dryer a hybrid, or some kind of -- right."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "The fact that the dryer takes in the output of the washer argues for symbiotes."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "[livejournal.com profile] tiger_spot: 'I think they're plants. Or maybe a plant and a fungus. Clearly there's some nutrient-sharing going on. (Socks.)'"
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "Or at least a form of co-evolution that allows for intricate interlacings, as they do occasionally appear independently. Though most often I think in the washer-but-no-dryer, not the other way around."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "You're saying I wash my clothes in a giant lichen."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "Yes."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "She further argues that this implies that it's the washer that's the plant, and the dryer is (sort of) parasitic on it."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "The symbiosis could be facultative rather than obligate. Though you don't often see a dryer without a washing machine, only the other way around. Maybe the dryer is actually parasitizing the washer."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "Stop that."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "She says 'neener neener'."
[livejournal.com profile] lstone reads the conversation, nods thoughtfully, goes to work.
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut thumbsup.
[livejournal.com profile] lstone pulls his clothes out of the parasite, first.
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "I suppose the strong resemblance between washers and dryers is an imitative camouflage thing, given that they don't even belong to the same kingdom."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen goes back to washers and dryers. "Which do you suppose is more vulnerable to predation?"
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "Well ... dryers are almost always front load, whereas washers are sometimes top-load. I would think this makes dryers, on the whole, more accessible to variety of predators, whereas many washers are accessible only to predators that can climb."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "Because of access to the vulnerable innards."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "Both tend to keep their vulnerable backsides up against the wall."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "Right. On the other hand, dryers have that big air tube. All the lines leading into and out of a washer are relatively small."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "Which is again a point in favor of dryer vulnerability."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "Which would indicate that the dryer's trying to pass as a washer."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "On the other hand, I've seen front-load washers, but no top-load dryers."
[livejournal.com profile] keshwyn wonders how line drying fits into all of this.
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "Oh right, I was building on a point about dryer vulnerability, not washer vulnerability. I, uh, forgot. Anyway, we're back to imitative camouflage, which I'm pretty sure is not the term for that. --Well, as suggested by some long squiggly lines in the Burgess Shale...."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "I have successfully re-distracted [livejournal.com profile] tiger_spot (who is now swatting me as I type this), and she thinks they're either like plants or buffalo, and there aren't any large predators in the typical home environment."
[livejournal.com profile] lilairen says, "The size of the access lines indicates small predators."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "We seem to be talking mostly about small predators that can climb inside them, anyw.... Seriously, stop it."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "Of course, in the laundromat environment, there are the predators who are after the quarters, but usually they're attacking the obviously-parasitic-or-symbiotic quarter-eating organisms, and only incidentally attacking the washers and dryers that host them."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut considers the significance of the PLEASE DO NOT USE DYE IN THESE MACHINES sign in the laundry room.
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "[livejournal.com profile] tiger_spot also feels that it's an important point that what happens when a small predator climbs inside the washer or dryer is nothing good (for the predator)."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "I wouldn't be too sure about that. It's not like dryers are in operation all the time. Hunting water buffalo is dangerous too, but predators still do it."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "Hmm."
[livejournal.com profile] oneironaut says, "The quarter-eating mechanisms may actually have some kind of symbiosis with the predators. All that rattling change is noisy, and alerts them."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "But there are clearly other predators who attack the quarter boxes and destroy them to take the quarters."
[livejournal.com profile] brooksmoses says, "It's a complex ecosystem. I wonder how the security cameras fit into it...."
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